Hi friends, People ask me often how I get over bad reviews and keep going even when people are unimaginably cruel. I think it’s important to note that my initial, visceral reaction to bad reviews is still…well, bad. I do have a secret weapon, though…
I agree completely. There is plenty of writing I know to be objectively good but don’t enjoy reading, or that I love and my husband hates. We all have different taste. I don’t have too much difficulty in applying this to feedback on my writing - I am confident it is objectively good, and also that some will not like it. It would be great if reviewers understood this and didn’t trash things that are just not their jam, but we don’t love in a perfect world!
Everyone thinks differently about what has been written - wouldn't do for everyone to think the same - that would be creepy.
I cannot understand why the person in your second email had to be so rude - you were apologising and offering a replacement book most authors probably wouldn't do it's his/her loss.
It's as if Russell had hidden the Unsubscribe button or something. It's right there at the bottom of every email, and Russell is more conscientious than most about scrubbing email lists, giving everyone an opportunity to bow out if they haven't been opening or reading or enjoying them...
*sigh*
I've dealt with similar persons. It's obvious that there's a bigger drama playing out in their lives and I'm just an NPC who must be brushed aside (or "taken down a peg"). Knowing this makes it easier to shrug it off.
Be glad we are only NPCs and not main characters in their life stories.
Very encouraging! And a good reminder to go out there and get more data to better categorise between subjective/objective feedback. I mean I think..usually…that I can tell if the roof of my literary building is structurally sound…but sometimes I do need need another person to look up and go “yep. Not getting wet in here. Well built”. Then we can talk about design taste…
I like the distinction you explore here between objective and subjective quality. I have struggled with this tension for twenty years now: objective excellence is absolutely achievable, but subjective delight is ...subjective.
I was going to say "a crapshoot" or "mercurial" or "impossible to predict," but none of those are true about subjective appreciation of your work. It is a gamble to some extent, of course, or at least specific ads and marketing tactics are gambles. But it isn't a complete crapshoot, because you know what makes your work distinct. You know you have better chances with people who like things like your book. And some readers will become fans— fans are not mercurial.
Very true but you don't have to be rude. You may not agree with what is being said so just delete the e-mail, or put your point of view across politely.
Great points. This is why I only fab leave reviews for books I love.
Dang. A little dyslexic there? I only leave fab reviews. Better.
I agree completely. There is plenty of writing I know to be objectively good but don’t enjoy reading, or that I love and my husband hates. We all have different taste. I don’t have too much difficulty in applying this to feedback on my writing - I am confident it is objectively good, and also that some will not like it. It would be great if reviewers understood this and didn’t trash things that are just not their jam, but we don’t love in a perfect world!
So true. I even have read reviews and found just the thing they found "bad" to be what I liked.
Everyone thinks differently about what has been written - wouldn't do for everyone to think the same - that would be creepy.
I cannot understand why the person in your second email had to be so rude - you were apologising and offering a replacement book most authors probably wouldn't do it's his/her loss.
It's as if Russell had hidden the Unsubscribe button or something. It's right there at the bottom of every email, and Russell is more conscientious than most about scrubbing email lists, giving everyone an opportunity to bow out if they haven't been opening or reading or enjoying them...
*sigh*
I've dealt with similar persons. It's obvious that there's a bigger drama playing out in their lives and I'm just an NPC who must be brushed aside (or "taken down a peg"). Knowing this makes it easier to shrug it off.
Be glad we are only NPCs and not main characters in their life stories.
Very encouraging! And a good reminder to go out there and get more data to better categorise between subjective/objective feedback. I mean I think..usually…that I can tell if the roof of my literary building is structurally sound…but sometimes I do need need another person to look up and go “yep. Not getting wet in here. Well built”. Then we can talk about design taste…
love that.
I like the distinction you explore here between objective and subjective quality. I have struggled with this tension for twenty years now: objective excellence is absolutely achievable, but subjective delight is ...subjective.
I was going to say "a crapshoot" or "mercurial" or "impossible to predict," but none of those are true about subjective appreciation of your work. It is a gamble to some extent, of course, or at least specific ads and marketing tactics are gambles. But it isn't a complete crapshoot, because you know what makes your work distinct. You know you have better chances with people who like things like your book. And some readers will become fans— fans are not mercurial.
Very true but you don't have to be rude. You may not agree with what is being said so just delete the e-mail, or put your point of view across politely.